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DS86DS

DS86DS

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Women like THAT are ten a penny? 😳

You'd have to wonder why Ireland is so badly run and managed in comparison to the Nordic countries. As all 5 Nordic countries have small populations like Ireland with limited natural resources (with the exception of Norway), there should be no excuse.
 

Mowl

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Yes, mostly. Of course there are many munters too, but none as bad as say Fave Deeney's fat slag with the chops of a chipmunk on her. Think I'd rather shag Val than that heap of fat and gristle.

Pretty girls are ten a penny up here, the Slavic features are as common as the Nordic features: but it works very nicely on the ladies, the blokes, not so much. They all manage to look rather severe, their natural facial features appear hardened and austere, even when they're in a good mood.

Think Mika Hakkinen holding the championship trophy aloft: he looks like he has a severe migraine going on.

But one thing the Finnish ladies truly adore are the darkest of eyes, and mine being pretty much black, I get lots of attention and people approaching me to ask if I'm a tourist. I always reply in Finnish, that bowls them right over. I try to drop some Gaelic too, that enchants them completely. But even though they apologize for themselves all the time, their spoken English is leagues ahead of your average Irish thicko like Val or Deco. They understand how the grammar works and if they make even one error, they immediately start apologizing.

Generally, this can be remedied by asking them to open youtube and listen to some Irish knacker yapping in jazes only knows what kind of English. But again: English is a distant third language after Finnish all over Finland, Swedish - in the enclaves, and English in the main cities. Other towns rank Russian as third after Swedish, but those are mostly up north towards Karjala, which was annexed by the Russians after the Winter war. It was since gifted back and is the homestead for all true Finns of the north. Karjala is Valhalla to these FInns.

When my ex-wife and one or two other ladies I dated came to Ireland for the first time, they finally understood what I meant about their perfect English: they met a few knackers and scobes when I took them gallivanting around Dublin. They honestly thought the knackers were speaking Irish. They weren't. They were speaking standard Dublin English. Skanger bastards.

You'd have to wonder why Ireland is so badly run and managed in comparison to the Nordic countries. As all 5 Nordic countries have small populations like Ireland with limited natural resources (with the exception of Norway), there should be no excuse.

There aren't any excuses to change my mind. I love my country, I love being Irish, but I will not live there. She's a broken down old hag who's too proud and too stupid to fix herself up to the standards acceptable up here. In Ireland, anything and everything that could possibly go wrong is 100% definitely going to go wrong.

It starts with: 'ahhhh, sure lookit...'

And from there drips down into the gutters. She's filthy, trashy, has neither class nor sophistication, is scruffy and unkempt, is in dire need or a complete trouncing and a starting all over again from the beginning, and is massively overpriced and doesn't seem to care what people think when they're handed the bill for two pints, a chicken and cheese sandwich, handing over a fifty and getting thirty cents back in some piss and bleach stinking shithole in Temple Bar.

Add in some paddy-whackery and diddley-o and sell it for cash dollar money.

In short, Ireland at the moment is too broke to fix.

The more band-aids they apply, the more it all falls apart.

One thing I CAN tell you is this: if Ireland was being run by a state authority like here in Finland? Then she'd manage to deserve a decent reputation. But as she is now? Forget it. Even the Finns are blithely honest about it:

'.....why is everything so messy and unworkable? We were told this was a beautiful old city full of history and old ghosts. It's filthy. On the streets and in the pubs too. It's dangerous, there are creeps everywhere. Thieves, junkies, homeless children sleeping in doorways. What's wrong with you Irish? Is this really what you call expected standards and quality of life? Wait - what? What's quality of life? Err. it's about the state that taxes us providing us with what we're paying for, not pocketing the cash and blaming someone else. We expect our lives to be safe and enjoyable, our cities also safe, our culture all around us, our children happy to roam around by themselves going to and from schools. Our women not having to worry if her skirt is appropriate or about to cause her some violence from some skanger bastard on the prowl....'

You guys might be able to cope with it, but not me.

Fuck that - I want to be happy and enjoy every passing day. I don't want to wait until things 'get better' by themselves. That's an illusion, nothing gets better by itself. It has to be made so. That's why I pay my Finnish taxes on time and with pride. For every one per cent I put in, we all get two hundred per cent back in quality of life terms. This IS a topic for daily discussion in our parliament houses: 'are our people happy, and are all of them catered for? Is there anybody being left out? How do we fix it? What else can we do besides what we're already doing to provide for everyone's comfort and security? We have education and health care covered and they're the best in the world. We have infrastructure and logistics covered too, but maybe we can update things to make the even better than they already are? Where's the zeitgeist with the people? Are we answering to their wishes? If not, why not? Best to deal with it now or we'll be out of parliament next election. Who needs what? How do we get it to them? What treats can we offer on top of the endless and burgeoning social activities already available? Are there enough street parties? Are all types catered for? Maybe we should simply ask the people by referendum what they would like to see happen, change, being built, being replaced with a better version, and so on?

Politics in Ireland?

'What's the pension and expenses like and how much are you paying me? How hard do I have to work? Am I accountable for my errors? Will I go down if I get caught stealing and robbing? Is there anyone else I can blame? Will the media be kind to me if I pay them to? Where's the bar?'
 
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DS86DS

DS86DS

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I prefer the Finnish look on ladies which seems to be more Baltic / Eastern than the more Germanic Scandinavian look. Though it seems like some Swedes could pass for Finns, but never Danes who seem closer to the Dutch and Northern Germans. Finnish women also seem a lot less conformist in their dress sense and style than other Nordics.

I think in Nordic countries, they have zero tolerance for any bullshit or corruption. In Ireland, it seems that x, y and z politician can get away with certain misdeeds providing they are shown to provide a benefit or two to the voter, e.g. "Scandalous what Jimmy did with all that public money, using cash which should have gone toward the local health clinic on holidays for himself and home improvements. But sure doesn't he keep the road free of pot holes? And for all you know, the other fella could be as bad as him, if not worse".
 
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DS86DS

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Not sure why but the Finnish wilderness has a Wild West feel to it at times, like a European Wisconsin or Oregon. The countrysides of Ireland and Britain seem very tame and manicured by comparison...in the Arctic there is untouched rugged wilderness galore and long may it last. As the Finns seem to be good custodians of the land, it looks like it is in safe hands.

Would be a great place for camping and fishing for sure.


K58-FI.finnish.450.jpg
 

Mowl

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It's mainly because it's a real true wilderness. Going for a trek around up north requires a variety of dress codes depending on the season. Summertimes are a horror of mosquitos which never stop buzzing around you. If like me you're allergic, you better cover yourself thoroughly and completely otherwise they'll make mincemeat of you in minutes. The heat can be unbearable too, so you have to find a compromise between being somewhat comfortable and exposing any skin to the mozzies. Get enough bites and you can pass out, their bites start to poison the blood and reduce your energy levels until you can't move at all - in which case you're pretty much dead. You may think you're alone in the wilderness but you're not - there's always some form of creature shadowing you: wolves, bears, wild cats, etc.

In winter you have to deal with severe temperatures way down into the minus register. Trekking out in your sneakers and a thick jumper won't do you any good at all: you'll freeze to death on the spot, just like many Russian troops given look-out post duties, many of them froze solid where they were standing and the Finns usually left them there to frighten the other Russians who came to check them out.

You also have to arm yourself. Most hunters and trekkers bring a rifle and a pistol. Then you need a quality knife for multi-purposes: stabbing, skinning, cutting, and even self-defence. If you only have a knife you better learn to climb high and quickly too. A hungry wolf pack can tear you to shreds and finish you off in minutes. Frighten a herd of moose by stumbling through their position can see you crushed to death; moose aren't very intelligent - they're big enough to walk right through your house rather than take the longer route when startled.

Bears are a bit less prevalent than in historic times: most of them are chipped and there are clear warning signs in the areas they set their dens. It's madness to think you can just head in and take a few photos. If they think their cubs are in any danger they'll chase you down and tear you apart, then eat you while your heart's still beating.

Guns are an essential item up north, this is why they're licensed for sale all over Finland.

Every house has at least one, even down here in the south. Leaving your rifle in your cabin isn't a smart thing to do. Most take them apart and bring them home for maintenance, then reassemble them when heading back up. It's a lifestyle many here enjoy, they like the fact that there's danger near at all times and they have to learn to not just live with it, but excel at it. Newbies are always connected by some form of rope to connect them to the scout leaders. Get lost and you're toast, they might send someone to collect your bones later but if you decide to stray and can't find your way back, it's all over.

If it's all a bit too much for you, best stay in the cities; nature here is wild, aggressive, desperate, and fast.
 
Loved that little monty python song 'Finland'.

Finland, Finland, Finland
the country where I'd like to be
pony-trekking or camping
or just watching TV
 
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DS86DS

DS86DS

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That's unusual, more so as most Finns seem to have excellent English speaking skills as it is. Not sure why they'd want to abandon speaking Finnish though?
 
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DS86DS

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Imagine Helsinki did adopt English as their language and it resulted in it becoming the Spain of the North with British tourists flocking in their millions.

All the cute small red cabins serving coffee would become English pubs serving Carling, English breakfasts... newspaper stands outside the Lutheran Cathedral selling The Sun newspaper....the fort a haven for lager louts and sun bathers etc etc 😅
 

Mowl

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Our language is Finnished! Mayor of Helsinki says the capital should become an ENGLISH-speaking city because theirs is too difficult for foreigners to learn


You believe everything you read in the Daily Mail, Jambo?

Jeez fuck, that explains a lot I suppose.

Imagine Helsinki did adopt English as their language and it resulted in it becoming the Spain of the North with British tourists flocking in their millions.

There used to be a couple of Scottish bars and one English 'house' but they all failed and shut down. There are seven Irish pubs in Helsinki alone. I use precisely none of them. There's an Aussie bar which is good fun: called 'The Aussie Bar' and their logo is upside down. Their byline under their name reads: 'you will be served by the sons of criminals' in reference to Australia's former existence as an open prison for the Irish and other peoples the Brits took a dislike to.

Link: https://aussiebar.net/

I don't go to bars often myself, maybe a couple of times a year for arranged events. I find it difficult to simply sit in a pub and drink with others. For most of my life as an artist and musician, I always had a purpose, a reason to be there for work. So when I do attend a pub event, I get all antsy and can't relax because there's neither any art to create nor any music to be performed.

I prefer having friends over: dinner here in the apartment or else up above on the rooftop barbecue area with sauna and a games room. It's much more intimate and relaxing, and Finns also enjoy fun at home before hitting the town. It's far cheaper, the options are many, and it all happens to your chosen soundtrack. Nice.

All the cute small red cabins serving coffee would become English pubs serving Carling, English breakfasts... newspaper stands outside the Lutheran Cathedral selling The Sun newspaper....the fort a haven for lager louts and sun bathers etc etc 😅

Will never happen. The Finns are far too proud to attend bars operating on a 'cultural' level. If they want that kind of fun then there are several Irish bars, which are noted for their lack of any rules about decorum. In fact, they want their customers to be rowdy and dancing drunk on the tables: they sell more beer that way.

In fact, some Irish clubs I've played up here will grade the worth of the house band by the number of glasses smashed on the floor. If nobody gets up the tables to dance, then you suck. You won't be asked back for further dates.

If that happened Mowl Mowl would move out to the mokki permanently :cool:

The way I'm feeling at the moment, a few months in a traditional mökki up the country by a lake would be a godsend.

I do love Helsinki, but I also enjoy solitude. That's pretty much exactly what you get if you're alone in the countryside with little more than a borrowed rifle to defend yourself from the animals in the wilds. Go fishing, set traps for rabbits, forage for nuts and berries, kantarel mushrooms, wild herbs, and so on. A little radio to stay in touch with the world - but also a large music system to blare across the lake as you fish. No phone coverage, no telly, no electricity (not you E Electricity) and nobody bothering you with their lame and moronic bullshit.

Finland's the easiest place in the world to cease to exist, to disappear completely and never be found.

It happens in the cities too, mind.

I like it. Many of you may not - but that's just our mindsets, it's what makes us all unique I suppose.
 
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DS86DS

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Have you been to the other Finnish cities such as Turku, Tampere and Oulu?
 

Mowl

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Have you been to the other Finnish cities such as Turku, Tampere and Oulu?

Yes, of course: many times. The Senators Of Helsinki party band were extremely busy over the years we were active and nationally we had many heavy-weight clients who booked us on a regular basis. Company events, weekend conventions, corporate gatherings, general jollies, and so on. This took us all over Finland over the decade and more we were operating.

I offer our clients a bespoke service, my intention was to create a project based on my own disadvantages. Because back then when I wasn't fully fluent in the Finnish language, I offered the clients a blank slate: that is, they picked the music they wanted to hear, not me. And not the band members either. Most party bands list the material they have ready on their websites and hope that people like their choices.

I went the other route and any client calling me would be told the same thing: no, we don't offer the songs - you pick them. Any songs you like, doesn't matter how old, how new, jazz, blues, rock, pop, evergreens, whatever. Sit down and list the all the songs you want and I'll offer you a price list you can choose from: fifty songs in two sets €XXXX, sixty songs in three sets €XXXX, eighty songs in five sets €XXXX, and so on.

They send me the list, I create a stream of all the songs on youtube and forward it to the other guys, they rehearse and arrange their own parts at home based on simple instructions: the chosen key, tempo, style, and final arrangement. We rarely had time to meet for rehearsals, but we could account for new tracks during the stage production period in the early afternoon: I would arrive, build the PA system, choose the lighting and add a decorative theme - I always liked using birch tree branches attached to everything onstage, like so:


senatorial.md.jpg


That one's taken behind the closed curtains, but you get the idea.

Then we'd run through a few bars of each new song we haven't played before to nail the feel, groove, and style. Time's always short so we don't rehearse the whole song, just the major elements, then do another until we have them all boxed off. When that's all done, the boys head off to the hotel or home, depending on where we are. I stick around to do the ambassadorial part when the clients/guests begin to arrive and make sure everyone has our card and access to our online site.

Doing shows up in Oulu and the likes can be tough: it's a nine hour drive each way - so a hotel has to be booked for five. That's accounted for in the bill. We could fly and hire what we need locally, but I dislike that and so do the other guys. We play better on our own rigs. And in our own suits. There have been times when we hire locally, but that's for places like Kittilä, Sodänkylä, Rovaniemi, and other northerly towns. We'd fly up in an hour rather than drive for ten. The guys are all professional people and time is of the essence. Mikko: author, atheist, and ex-head of the theology dept of Helsinki University; Jukka's a junior diplomat often flying around Europe, the other two lads are professional military men. Antti's a lieutenant and heads the department looking after the enlisted lads doing their national service, and Marko's a top-notch marksman with sniper experience in a few conflict zones. He also did some time with the French Foreign Legion. These men also have families, so I do all the legwork and negotiation. And most everything else except drive - I've never driven a car, have no license, and little interest in getting one. I like maps, I like changing the music, sitting upfront doing the paperwork and speaking on the phone.

What matters here is the performance: I'm Irish, Finnish music is in Finnish, not English. People choose songs from the 1920's, 1950's and so on. I have to not just know how to play it, but play it better than any Finnish person can. Same with vocals: I have to know my backing parts and that requires fluency in Finnish. If a client asks for even more obscure Finnish traditional songs, I have to find them and get them to the other guys to work on. Then do my own work at home too.

The travel aspect is great, I love watching the road go by and the green fields of summer or the white-out of winter. Finland is beautiful no matter what the season. We're entering autumn and the colours are changing to orange and red on the trees. Driving through the various lake-lands and forests is stunning. Every season. Travel is a necessary evil in the music business, as is a thorough knowledge of historic Finnish music and other traditional party elements. Private clients booking for parties, weddings, graduations, etc always ask for more or less the same songs, funnily enough. But those kind of parties are more intimate: we eat at our own table with the guests, not in the dressing room. We use table service, just like anyone else. So we get to know our clients and do all the glad-hand during the breaks, and this generates more work from other guests who see us do our thing. Once you're in - you're good to go. If not, the doors are nigh on impossible to kick in, especially for an immigrant running a local Finnish music band.

Irish people judge Finnish music and think it's bizarre: the lyrics for a start, the traditional style of arrangement for another. It's no more like European music than pure Irish trad is. It has a style of its own. But it rarely makes it past the Finnish border. Because no-one but us understand it. It'd be like a Finn arriving in Ireland and never having heard Irish trad or Irish-style rock. Then trying to sell himself as a viable product people actually want. Doesn't happen - and for obvious reasons. So if I get handed a sheet of titles and none of them were released before 1950, I have to know what the fuck I'm doing when designing arrangements for professional Finnish musicians who can play on the fly. That's why I chose the team we have: these guys are no more drunk rock and rollers than I am a priest. They do it for fun and extra cash. They get to blow off some steam onstage: I do it as my profession, so I have to give them things they can figure out at a glance.

All in all, it's a hell of way to earn a living but it was a massive success even given the whammy of a non-Finnish Paddy running the show. People reacted very positively to the product, they thought it was so cool that an Irish person could be so immersed in their historic music. But to me, it was all just one brick after another, building something out of nothing. A shaky concept at best but one that worked because I applied myself to it. Then the doors opened very quickly and we were a hot product. We traveled all over Finland and also to Sweden for Finnish events there. What looked like a project set to fail actually took off rather quickly. The fees involved were hefty so all of our accounts had to be handled so that the taxman got his cut - dodge your taxes and you're finished, it'll fuck you up in dozens of ways. Honesty is the best policy, it works. Besides, I'm happy to pay my taxes - look what I get for them? And on top of that comes my own fees as a self employed entrepreneur. Magic.

I miss it, but sooner or later things are going to open up again, and we're ready: we don't have to do anything, just wait.
 
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